Minister of Miscellaneous

Minister of Miscellaneous

The other day I ran across one of my favorite old newsletter articles from September 1998. I had been looking for it for years and in the big move, otherwise known as my personal “organizational apocalypse,” I discovered it among the chaos. I am going to use this “enhanced” word from the sayings of John the Baptist to justify my action today….reprint!!!!!

From Your Minister of Miscellaneous…

One day while “surfing” the radio, my attention was gripped by a country tune. Country singers are some hurting people. Perhaps their music helps them to cope. I decided we church folks hurt occasionally, so maybe a couple of songs would helps us. I haven’t worked on tunes yet, but here are some verses with a country flavor that might help us to deal with our pain:

Someone picked the onion rangs off my greenbean casserole
And someone took my favorite plate and Momma’s antique bowl.
But those are risks you have to take while eatin’ at the church
Cause feedins are serious business
and sometimes fellership hurts.

How about

I was reprimanded by the parent of a teen.
She wasn’t nice and cordial – She was doggone mean.


That nice little family came to our church
And sat in our favorite pew.
It hurt when I had to tell ‘em
Them seats wuz for me-n-you.

I’ll close with

Candy wrappers rattlin’
Durin’ preacher’s pastoral prayer
And little Darlene a tattlin’
About Johnny pullin’ her hair.
Good-n-Evil’s always a battlin’
Satan’s sittin’ in a pew over thar
So instead of gossipin’ and gabbin’
You might want to say yore prayers…
Yes, you might want to say yore prayers.

I guess there are plenty of things in church we can whine about. If this should occur, let me suggest another song:

“I was glad when they said unto me, let us go into the house of the Lord”

Andy O. (704) 300-0062